Sorry.

That last post probably freaked you all out. Not to mention the state of my wrists. I'm sorry. My mind went through the garbage disposal, and it was already next to the drain to begin with. I don't know what's up with me lately. I'm sorry. For everything. For being such a major jerkwad. For putting you through all of this. For cussing you all out at various times.

You receive what you give,

And this is like nothing,

I feel like s**t,

But at least I feel something... ("Disconnected" by In Flames)

I love you all.

You maniacs.

Well.

I feel like killing myself. Everything is so ridiculously screwed up right now...

1. My parents are NAZIS, and expect so much from me, and practically kill me if I don't deliver.

2. My brother is ridiculously overdramatic and has an inflated sense of self-importance.

3. My other brother is a self-righteous zealot, thankfully, though, he's on a mission and I won't be seeing him till October.

4. I hate myself and every little thing I do to dig myself deeper into this hellhole I've made.

5. I got dumped by someone I'm not going out with.

6. I've tried prayer, but God really never did a thing for me.

7. I get the sense that God does exist, but he just put us on this earth to laugh his head off at our misery.

8. I've been sick for three gorramn weeks now.

9. I have to live with my family for 4 more years.

10. There is no escaping morons at school who deserve death.

11. I feel like no loving God would have made something like me, and that by Darwin's theory of natural selection, I should be dead. I'm a genetic mistake.

Then, there's this:

I'm hearing voices.

They tell me to hurt myself and other people. I'm so scared of myself right now, I think it's a good idea for me to die and never worry other people again... am I right?

Love Stinks, yeah yeah

I don't mind being in love, it's just that you get a) weird paranoia that it's too good to be true, and b) strange feeling that girl you liked months ago now likes you and gorramnit why didn't she like you THEN when you were obsessed with her? That would've been nice, but now you're completely over her, but you liked her for a reason and GAH. Whatever. Oh also, you get c) separation madness. That's nice. So, you know what, a list. Of everything i need to do but never do.

1. Learn to play that stupid guitar

2. Find a way to get more money

3. Find a way to sleep more

4. Get out of my house more

5. Learn to code

6. Get a life

7. Parkour!

8. Sleep

9. Homework

10. Download Monty Python vids from the Interwebs

11. Get more music

12. Read the Bible and BoM.

13. I think you know.

Love,

the #1 guy

Smile, you're on Candid Camera

I bet none of you get that. Alright! update, guys! Cold as he- wait. Why would heck be cold? Never mind, it's cold as Nathan's heart outside, and I have to write a story for biology. Sorry, but I'll start writing your story as soon as I have time, I promise! So, here's what's going down right now. My computer fried itself Thursday, we have a brand new 10 year old XP now, and I'm pretty much the only one who's going to use it. And, I LOVE IT. Windows Media Player 9. SO, SO, SO much better than WMP 10. Tricked it out with Chrome and some old star wars game, and hot diggety dang, this thing has become beast. Got so bored, though.

That story will come in a while, I promise thee.

Ach.

Today. Sucked. Epicly.

So, to cheer myself up (and maybe you!), here's some stuff to do.

nitrome.com

pandora.com

oddlyspecific.com

armorgames.com

escapistmagazine.com

And a few quotes:

I told the ambulance men the wrong blood type for my ex, so he knows what rejection feels like

I like Jesus, but he loves me, so it's awkward

A problem shared is attention gained

Looking at my face is like reading in the car. It's all right for 10 minutes, then

you start to feel sick (This is so me...)

I never know the right thing to say, especially during sex. After my first time, I said to the girl, 'That's it, I'm afraid'

What's a couple?' I asked my mum. She said, 'Two or three'. Which probably explains why her marriage collapsed

And you ma'am, are ugly, but I shall be sober in the morning

It's fairly obvious, since Richard Nixon, that there is no such thing as a fair deal for any voter in the United States — You're just not gonna get it. It's a joke — the people that you vote for, they're the next best thing to criminals. But of course they have money for advertising campaigns that make them look a little bit better than they actually are.

Being interviewed is one of the most abnormal things that you can do to somebody else. It's two steps removed from the Inquisition.

After all, he [God] wrote this book here, and in the book it says he made us all to be just like him! So if we're dumb, then God is dumb - and maybe even a little ugly on the side

The rock and roll business is pretty absurd, but the world of serious music is much worse.

It isn't necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice — there are two other possibilities: one is paperwork, and the other is nostalgia.

The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else's life.

The first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they're property.

Drop out of school before your mind rots from exposure to our mediocre educational system. Forget about the Senior Prom and go to the library and educate yourself if you've got any guts. Some of you like Pep rallies and plastic robots who tell you what to read. Forget I mentioned it. This song has no message. Rise for the flag salute.

Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents — because they have a tame child-creature in their house.

Rock journalism is people who can't write, interviewing people who can't talk, in order to provide articles for people who can't read.

Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.

Scientology, how about that? You hold on to the tin cans and then this guy asks you a bunch of questions, and if you pay enough money you get to join the master race. How's that for a religion?

If you wind up with a boring, miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest or some guy on TV telling you how to do your s**t, then YOU DESERVE IT.

think it's really tragic when people get serious about stuff. It's such an absurdity to take anything really seriously ... I make an honest attempt not to take anything seriously: I worked that attitude out about the time I was eighteen, I mean, what does it all mean when you get right down to it, what's the story here? Being alive is so weird.

-Aaron. I love you

The Green Mile

I hate to make two posts on the same day, but I just watched The Green Mile, and I cried. Hard. That movie was so sad... You got to know and love the characters, especially *sniff* John Coffey. "John Coffey, ma'am, just like the drink, but not spelled the same." And then in the end.... *sob sob cry cry* I can't remember the last time I cried during a movie. I think this might be the first... Okay, spoiler, they put him in the electric chair, and they're about to put the hood on him, and then he says. "Please, boss. Don't put that on me. I's afraid of the dark." I sobbed. I loved that movie.

out of 4 stars, this one gets 5.

I love you all.

Ohohohohoh

The above is the title of an epic song. So, I hate to tell you all this, but I'm quite afraid that story of yours will be quite a while. A list of things to blame (I like making lists):

1. My mother

2. Upstairs computer fried

3. English Essay

4. Biology Project

5. Lack of sleep

6. My brother needs the other computer

7. Orthodontics

8. The Mafia

That's everything you can blame. You may not, in any way, blame me for this. On the upside, life is good again... (i think i'm becoming bipolar... bad...)

I love you. And you can all take turns guessing who I love the most.

-Aaron

The future looks bleak and hopeless

Ugh. To the two of you that read this, hello. I've suddenly come down with IRIWIS. (It Really Isn't Worth It Syndrome.) I don't feel like existing as a state of sentient consciousness anymore. I'd much rather sleep the rest of my life, which should be nicely short. Some reasons for my sudden, abrupt, depression:

1. Only one good thing happens to me all day, and that usually only lasts about an hour, and it's in the morning, so my day only gets worse from there.

2. This planet is going to Hell faster than a murderer on death row, and there is not a gorramn thing that could be done that anyone is doing.

3. People are stupid, self-centered, self-righteous, obnoxious brats who think they're better than everyone else (Before you call me a hypocrite, see reason #4, I don't think too highly of myself.)

4. I just realized, I have to live with myself for the rest of my life, and he's a jerk.

5. I need a hug and the only person capable of doing so in my house is my dog.

6. Not getting enough sleep. Not by a long shot.

7. Adding to reason #3, there are people in this world who have to be genetic mistakes, because no loving God would make something like them, and by Darwin's theory of natural selection, they should be dead.

8. Society allows people in #8 to live.

9. Liberals are in charge of society and have not a gorramn clue what they're doing.

10. I have developed a sudden fetish with hurting myself and I'm scaring myself to the point where I have to hide the knife.

11. No one really wants to talk to or listen to me, which makes me feel unloved.

12. I have no idea how to contact the people who would listen to me, so I end up talking to myself or blasting metal/punk/ska/techno in my ears.

13. I need to get out of my house, away from it all, but there's really no good way.

14. I haven't worked out in forever because of reason #15.

15. I'm coughing up my lungs and quite a bit of disgusting green stuff.

16. Days are like hours, but hours are like days, if you know what I mean.

17. I'm forced to associate with a great deal of people on a daily basis, most of whom have a holier-than-thou complex. I can think of around five exceptions to this rule.

To the people that look at this on occasion, read this.

I love you for listening. Reading. Whatever.

♥ <-- This is for you. You know who you are.

-Aaron

Edit: P.S. If anyone cares? I have the story planned. I need to get it out on the computer.

A list of things to do before I become old and decrepit and worthless

Since a good friend of mine did this, what the heck, i'm going to do it too.

1. Exist. [X]

2. Ride a bicycle [X]

3. Kiss the prettiest girl I know [X]

4. Write a book and get it published

5. Get married (don't ask why)

6. Have children (again, don't ask why)

7. Get a job

8. Learn to drive

9. Get a very nice suit and wear it somewhere obscure

10. Grow a beard down to my legs

11. Learn to metal scream

12. Play an instrument [X]

13. Learn to speak Esperanto

14. Get through college

15. Legally own more than 4 cds by a single artist

16. Purchase an original work of art from someone

17. Draw something good

18. Own 5 cats throughout the course of my life, named Fuzzbucket, Fredrick William I, Allister, Jack the Ripper, and Warren Zevon

19. Make a list of things to do before I die [X]

20. Visit 5 different countries [Japan, Australia...]

21. Make someone's life BETTER for a change

22. Single-handedly save the princess while fighting off the hordes of demons sent by the Dark Lord with only a guitar and a pair of tongs, then battle the reincarnation of Attila the Hun with a cactus [X]

23. Go to a rock, metal, ska, or punk concert

24. Go to a rave!

25. Meet Eugene Hutz (the reincarnation of Jesus returned to do battle with Godzilla... [urbandictionary.com] but he is a real person)

That's what I want to do with my life. Sad, isn't it.

I love you all, except Jamison, because in the story that i'm writing for you, he will kill lots of people, including John.

-Aaron

what up, gangstas?

I'm from SoCal, so I can say that. Alright, I'm now working on the requested "epic any story". Whatever that means. The only thing I know is that Jamison will be a evil villain. He's just that sort of person. Probably take a week to a month, depending how much time I spend doing the L. Ron Hubbard Award story.

I love you.

-Aaron

Hey, a new post

I figured someone out there reads this every once in a while. So, hello, what's up, everybody? I really got nothing to say really... I find myself going insane from being trapped in this rathole with my parents and my brother and I need to get out more. But, I have some time on my hands, so I'm going to write you all a story! Comment below to tell what kind of story you'd like and I will not listen to you whatsoever! Just kidding, I'll pay attention. You have 48 hours, after which I will come back and write you all a nice story, yes? If you want, I can put your names in it, although Magechill, you'll have to tell me your real name...

I love you.

Aaron the Omnipotent Destroyer of Worlds and Devourer of Men

Shameless Advertsing!

Okay. So, nothing to do, whoo-hoo. Might as well tell y'all of some pretty Good stuff:

Music:

Alesana (screamo emo)

Freakhouse (metal)

Gogol Bordello ( *Gypsy Punk* -so awesome)

Streetlight Manifesto (ska... explicit warning)

Mastodon (Metal)

Authors:

Orson Scott Card (sci-fi)

John Grisham (realistic fiction)

Me! xD (awesomeness...)

Terry Pratchett (comedy)

Douglas Adams (comedy)

Websites:

writersguild.forumcircle.com (writing... you can find Afterlife there, which is supposedly hilarious, but that's other people's words for it)

nitrome.com (games... GOOD ONES)

faliblog.org (comedy)

cracked.com (comedy... explicit warning)

billsblogofdoom.blogspot.com (something to show all of your friends, perhaps? :D)

YouTube vids *all clean except black button, which has the b word in it once*:

asdfmovie2 (utter bizarrity)(no, that's not really a word, I know)

Mastodon-Oblivion music video (music)

Blockhead (utter bizarrity)

Stampa med Leroy (teach you how to rave)

The Black Button (suspense)

Countries:

America (yeah!)

Lichtenstein (amazing european country)

Australia (we love you, amen)

Japan (working in the rice fields all day long...)

Canada (eh?)

Songs *all clean*:

Octavarium by Dream Theater (24 minutes of prog-metal awesomeness)

Super Taranta! by Gogol Bordello (incredible song)

Oblivion by Mastodon (It does say shameless advertising at the top :D)

Welcome To The Black Parade by My Chemical Romance (emo! but there's nothing wrong with that)

Holding On by Scary Kids Scaring Kids (a good mixture of heavy and emotional stuff, highly recommended)

I love you all.

-The Rt. Hon. Lt. Col. Billiam Quinton Fredrickson, M.D., PhD, esq.

Ah, goshdang IT ALL

Well. Second post in a day. Ugh. It hasn't even been 48 hours and I'm feeling so ridiculously lonely and sad. Maybe I have "Post-Magical Syndrome", where you experience something incredible and then your life is freaking MUNDANE afterwards. Next opportunity to experience magicalness- a week. GAH, I CANNA WAIT THAT LONG. I need to see her NOW, just to freaking talk to her! ugh...

On a completely unrelated note, the old hillview gang should get back together and do something THIS WEEK. Preferably Tues. or Wednes.

On yet another completely unrelated note, I got a Mastodon CD! whoo-hoo! those guys are like, epicness of epicness...

I'm signing off now, to go dream of a week from now. At least seminary i'll see her....

Ugh. who would've thought WINTER BREAK would be so antagonizing?

Id on'tk now

That looks like something out of some mysterious alien language. Huh. Well, I am "working on homework", and the blog gods commanded me to blog. This is addicting... blogging will become the new porn in future, watch... Only guys will do it because they are creeps and have nothing better to do...

Alright, everything seems to be going good, what's up Jamison Rucker, NEW FOLLOWER. You're awesome. Maybe I'll get more than one comment each post now. Din-din time. buh-bye.

Happy New Year (and/or Decade and/or Period of undefined time)

First off,

Happy New Year.

Second off, I have to say that this is a good start to a New Year. Last night/this morning, I went to the New Year's Dance! Huzzah! That was good because i got to see a few of my friends and for a couple of other reasons, too, which have put me in a darn good mood. (How DID Xavier get into that dance? o_O) :D Another good thing- I'm getting one heck of a lot of music, and it's making me happy because I finally have the space to fit it on my mp3! haha, i love sd cards. Thing 3- I'm playing a fun but dumb game on the interwebs, and it is amusing. Quatre- i just helped someone move, and service is always very nice and leaves me warm and fuzzy inside. Five- there's another dance in a week. :D!!!!!!

Good/bad thing- school! :D: Good about school- seminary and friends. bad about school - it's SCHOOL. and there's also Matt Binkley.

Bad thing- I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings. Gah. I HATE THAT BOOK. So dumb. Stupid questions.

If there's anything else to say, i'm not saying it. Fight the power! Blood for blood, right? :D

-Aaron, Sub, Bill, Garmelfinglia, Penjacker the Mighty, Conqueror of Worlds and Devourer of Men, Ruler of Lands that have small insects and lots of trees, and Who Enjoys a Good Dr. Pepper Now And Then.